Diary of a Dieter:
So my sister’s blog has recently inspired me for a couple of reasons:
- She is going Atkins…no more delicious breads, pastas or potatoes.
- Her blogs on the insanity of carb depravation are hilarious
goes went something like this:
I woke up 20 minutes early (which is an ungodly hour of the morning anyway) pulled my hair up in pony tail, threw on a sports bra, some leggings and a fantastic banana yellow T-shirt from a MS walk a few years back.
Proceed to my basement. In my basement lies a fantastic machine that I got for FREE (yes people, free) from someone that works in the same building I do. Let us ignore the fact that I got this machine about
a month three months ago and have been on it a total of one time! This machine is called the Fitness Flyer. Never heard of it? Think Tony the Pony with his spandex pants and ball cap with that crazy, curly - messy blonde hair fighting the back of the cap for some air and his Gazelle craze.
To warm up I do a few squats and stretches and then obediently place my hands on the center bar per machine’s direction for safety when mounting the machine. Off I go. I have my iPod playing and tell myself, “Ok, you are going to stay on this machine for about 3 or 4 songs.” (This was a trick I used during my days of tanning to give myself a good estimate of how much time had passed - the average song is what 3 ½ minutes?) Sounds like a good plan to me. ½ way through my first song I realized something. I am severely out of shape and the tension setting was turned up waaaay too much on this contraption. Short interlude where I turn the tension down so far the dial falls out...... Longer recess when I have to get off the machine, pick up said dial and carefully screw it back in; but not too tight, I wouldn’t want to overly exert my fluffy body. Don't. judge. me.
I make it through.... about a good 15 minutes on the lower setting, step off and decide I will jump rope a little bit for a “cool down” Was I nuts? Jump roping is sooo not a cool down. That was the “stick a fork in me I am done” down. Oh wait, the fork broke? I guess I was overdone then.
|I definitely did not look this happy......or buff!|